And so it begins…

The search for a bassist, drummer, and rythm guitarist. Spending the next 3 months of my life finding these people….

Writing from experience has just almost brought tears to my eyes.

I can honestly say these last few songs have been my best ever.

I was going to add a bridge to “Insomiac Melody” but when I found myself writing and not connecting with the song after writing the bridge, I took it out and repeated the chorus 3 times after the second verse. Now reading it, it portrays how I really felt, and I’m so proud of that. I guess I always tried to fit a mold when writing my songs. It had to be written a certain way because that is how most songs were written, but all of my other songs lost their meaning when I wrote that way. I never connected with them, and in turn they went into a folder never to be looked at again because I just didn’t like them, and I just thought I was a terrible song writer. Now I can really see why people say I write great songs, this time because I wrote a song so honest to myself, I couldn’t of hated it. I’m going back now to finish writing “Rachel”, which really started all of this honesty, when I wrote of my hate for someone who i haven’t seen since kindergarten. The theme of the song feels kinda of petty, so i almost didn’t want to write about it, but I didn’t want to write a love song, when I wasn’t in love, or out of it, so i decided to just go with this song idea, think i wouldn’t like it anyways. I was wrong, I loved it, i let everything out i wanted to back then, but couldn’t express at such a young age. Sure the song is kinda of bitchy, and just a tad hateful, but it’s honest, and i like it. I never understood, “write about what you know” and i never knew what i knew to write about it, so i guess that’s why I have hated all of my song until now. Before this, the only similar song was enemy in me, even though it’s vauge, it was more honest than any of my other songs, so that’s why i liked it so much back then. its a year old, and I still love it, because of it’s honesty to myself. Ahhh, I just feel like crying from happiness right now. I’m so proud of myself.

5 days ago ·